Our connection is static, but the static is still there.

Tonight I felt my hand clasp the cold, metal handle and as the door slid SHUT, I looked around the dark living room.

Have you ever found yourself standing in the middle of your life? Perhaps a puppy was tugging at your long skirt, too, but you felt a distance away – looking down and noticing as if for the first time,

I got another dog. This is my home.

Green data is burning from inside the entertainment console. The time, the station, the power is running to your plugged-in present. The silhouette of a cat greets you on the ledge into the kitchen, and you scratch his furry head.

You walk past the closed door holding Someone Special who went to bed early. They are contained, unaware that the night air let something in on the other side. They will not know that you were awake, saturated in everything that has happened up until this point in time.

No one has ever seen you like this, but you get this way, sometimes. If anyone happens to connect as long as You are here,

They will see straight into you.

It’s best that this happens at night.

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3 responses to “Our connection is static, but the static is still there.

  1. PhanToms in the night!

    Autumn Sweetheart, it’s difficult to tell whether you were feeling me or I was feeling you. I could be completely fucking delusional too. Just had to move outta my space; last load, floating around was that card from you. Recited it line for line a few times for the surveillance camera with audio outside; shared entry way p.o.v., so the neighbors could hear that there was once a woman that cared for me true. Tom just failed again, with the stalemate ultimatum, in sight, plain view. I’m uncertain whether I’m doing more harm or good in writing to you. It seems that your life is well on the way with ease and presence of mind in view. It seems I logged on while you were on aim. I had trouble trying to figure that out, so I’m writing you. I let go of things between us a long time ago, yet feel compelled to write you when I feel emotions surface every now and then, though. If it would ease your mind to chat with me, it looks like I’m going to be living at the library again during the day, till I can manifest another studio. Send me an email telling me how to rig up the aim thing or whatever. It’s still T_om_K_lov@hotmail.com. Fall time, Autumn season, always reminds me of the bygone yesterdays. How I tried to state my love for you, a thousand different ways. It feels like part of you still misses me, yet at the same time; to let you move on with what’s right in front of you, I should let it be. Tell me what to do. I don’t know anymore. I’ve been trying to engage what is tangible and in front of my face, out here in Colorado, yet to no avail. I can’t even find the words for what just happened or is happening, I’m unable to tell. I just know that for a brief moment my heart did sing, Had a chance, yet was usurped of the crown of a king. If you ever feel inclined to reach and touch this someone, here’s my number, yet again, the new one; 720-335-8309. Perhaps it could help each of us to heal and to be more present with what’s right in front of us, to know that in each other we’d have a friend until the end. It feels like an opening closure could allow our hearts to mend. Apologies again, that I freaked you out with all the care packages I used to send. To your patient, loving grace, I bow and bend. It always feels like there’s another chapter, even though we put things to an end. It seems I feel you from far away or you feel me, and that’s been the trend. Whatever you need to be whole, I offer fully, without just trying to lend. A warm smile and tender, yet firm hug, across the country to you, I send. Peace, T Om

  2. Very occasionally, do I stop and look at things like this. Usually, it happens at night, as you mention.

    It’s a very strange feeling, but not in a bad way. Sometimes, I feel like I’m waking up, and really noticing the things around me. I feel like, maybe I’ve just been going through the motions, sleep-walking through life.

    Or maybe that’s just me. ;)

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